A lot has happened in my life since that last post. Far too much and some things far too personal to share in this space, but things that have been significant. Things that have created some big shifts in how I see my world and how I choose to exist in it.
There are days when I completely cave into the above feelings, and other days I am able to see things as they really are and are meant to be - as the chicken needs to moult from time to time in order to gain the value of having stronger and fuller feathers to protect itself and get the most out of it's little chicken existence, I too have to shed some of what has become worn out and less useful to me for living my life fully and joyfully.
Now that I've acknowledge that, time to move on to what I feel has given me strength and purpose to get through the rough patches. My farm!
On our little farm, there have been additions of new life....
.... lives ended ....
.... and lives put to very good use to help nourish and keep our our family warm and cozy and keep the fence lines secure of predators who might like to have a piece of our Paradise.
Something I am very excited about is I have finally gotten the courage and community of friends and support to help me add some value to the wool my Shetland sheep provide us. This fall, I will be teaming up with some dear friends in my "knitting group", the Fundy Fibre Artisans, to sell some of my handmade goods from my sheep. This was always in the back of my mind when I adopted my sheep, three and a half years ago, but wasn't ready to take the leap until now. So much learning needed to happen before I could take that step! I am very excited about this venture and for now, it is giving me something I feel I've needed for awhile.
Things always turn out ok eventually. The trick is believing that it will. Here's a little poem I came upon recently that has been helpful in finding perspective when things go a bit out of whack.
Our problem - May I include you? - Is that we
don't know how to start, how to just close
our eyes and let something dance between
our hearts and lips, we don't know how
to skip across the room only for the joy of the leap.
We walk, we run, but what happens to the skip
and its partner, the gallop, the useless and imaginary
way we could move through space, the horses
we rode before we knew how to saddle up, before we
had opinions about everything and just loved
the wind in our faces and the horizon in our eyes.
- from Prayers and Run-on Sentences (Deerbook Editions, 2007)